Friday, 11 May 2018

Dessert Is Served In The Veg Plot.

I had one of my brainwaves ("oh no!") the other day.  I found a trifle in the fridge that was well passed its sell by date.  So me thinks to myself:

"Why not give the slugs and snails a slap up treat and I will catch them?"

So I took the trifle in its plastic ("what else these days?") container and plonked it down right in the middle of my slug laced Brassicas.  
Then I went back in the house for a sandwich and a brew.  I came back about ten minutes later and there to my horrow was a big brown RAT scoffing my snails and slugs trifle.  I called it names of an Anglo Saxon derivation and it fled through the sheep wire fence into the nettles and buttercups and grass growing next to the plot.

I was not an happy bunny and marched into the bungalow kitchen and read the riot act to Domino (the cat) and Fido (the terrier) about them not earning their keep.  They both walked out the door and they weren't allowed back in that day.  

Yesterday when I was working (gardening) at the big garden in town.  My wife rang me to tell me that either Domino or Fido had left me a furry present next to the garden furniture.   I think it must have been the cat because his murder technique is suffocation whilst Fido usually goes for the old: "Lets bite their heads off until their dead" method of execution. 

I got home later and sure enough there was a big brown dead rat ("You dirty rat!") lying prostrate on the gravel.  It seems quite clearly that dogs and cats understand every word we say!  

I won't be serving Dessert on the veg plot in the future.  If I want to find slugs and snails I just need to look in the compost heap, under a plank or under a paving slab, in my slug pubs or just look in my cabbage patch.  They are everywhere and you don't need to use trifle to find them or big brown Rattus Norvegicus.

21 comments:

  1. Our animals clearly have minds of their own. We used to have a cat lived in our shed. One day I was eating something (forget what now, but not an out of date trifle) and I gave the cat a couple of spoonfuls which it seemed to enjoy. Next morning there was a dead mouse on the doorstep. We kept this game up for a while until one day it left me a dead frog. I had to draw the line there.

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  2. Hi Gwil. We had a Border Collie that use to catch frogs and eat them. She was also partial to a can of bitter. I loved her very much but she wasn't allowed to drink from my barrel glass. They clearly do have minds of their own. Thanks!

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    Replies
    1. Your border collie had a taste for French cuisine. By the way, I accidentally trod on my first snail when I was closing the gate this morning. The crunch was enormous. Must have been a fine specimen. I expect something will come along and eat it before the day is out.

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    2. She was an expert canine fly catcher too. Do they eat snails in Austria Gwil?

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    3. The squashed snail has turned a curious shade of blue. Never heard of them on the menu. The thing they like to eat here is a square slab of pink steamy meat called horse-liver-cheese which comes on a bun from a stand on a street corner. Don't know what it is really. Looks like pork luncheon meat or spam.

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    4. I don't think I would love horse liver cheese. The Bratwurst was good when I was in Vienna. The Dunkels was good too.

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  3. I propose a serious treat for both animals, placed by the side of the suffocated Rat; just so they know what it's for.

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  4. Hi Cro. Very good but I have already disposed of old ratty. I will remember your good advice. Thanks!

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  5. Well done your rat protection crew! We have not had any signs of rats here lately, but we seem to have a hefty mole infestation in Veg Plot Two!

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    Replies
    1. Hi Vera. The old estate gardeners use to be happy if they could get old of some more hill soil. They used the lovely friable soil for compost. Have you tried empty glass bottles stuck into the soil? You can also buy battery ultrasound devices that emit high pitched sounds that scare money away. You need cats and terriers in the countryside. Thanks!

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    2. Thanks for the advice about the using the mole hill soil for compost. Not sure how empty glass bottles stuck into the soil will work but shall give that a try! Have got feral cats here but they are busy predating our hens. A terrier..... perhaps.

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    3. Your welcome Vera. Apparently if the bottles are vertical they wind will whistle down the bottles necks and the moles don't like the sound. It's worth a try. Wish I could get hold of some molehill soil.

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  6. Cats are brilliant rodent eradicatorsearen't they Rachel? Poor old Fido got praised too. Thanks!

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  7. Mice and birds, yes, rats no! Charlie either can't find any or he doesn't like the taste of rats.

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    Replies
    1. Domino catches birds sometimes, sadly. There always rats in the countryside. I have seen them eating blackberries and once saw fox with a dead rat in it's mouth. So foxes do a good job too sometimes. Charlie sounds a character. Thanks!

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  8. I have 2 dogs.....a schnauzer and a yorkie, both originally bred as ratters. A while ago there was a rat ensconced in the squirrel proof bird feeder scoffing for all he, or she, was worth......when I went out towards it, it dropped out practically on the schnauzers head, but neither of the dogs caught it ! Useless !

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    Replies
    1. They probably didn't know what it was. I wouldn't like to be the rat if it visits next time! Thanks.

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