Friday, 27 December 2019

Some Of My Angling Tales!

 ANGLING TALES.
Dunno if I have I have posted this before?  But here goes:
This is another pastime frequented by all different kinds of people.  You get the small kid who just wants to catch a fishy on the lishy.  He is happy catching sticklebacks and sharing his mum’s sandwiches with the local wildlife.

 Then there is the trout fisherman who only uses the fly and disapproves at the common Coarse fishing angler.   Trout man spends all his time trying to imitate a May fly and thinking of interesting tweed jackets.   He is often seen at a private stocked troutery, fishing for Triploids (had their sex organs electrically removed so they resemble bullocks) that  have had about two dustbins of trout pellets a second.  Trout man is really chuffed when he catches one of the Leviathans and proudly shows off his catch!
I spent a lot of my youth and early adulthood Coarse fishing.  Every stream, flooded quarry, canal, mill pond, river, reservoir and lodge was fished.  All just so that I could catch a fish and let it go again. 
Oh what joy it was to look down at your maggot box and see a big brown rat eating the bran.  I am terrified of rats (shit scared) and they soon helped me pack up my tackle and run home!  I think my rat phobia goes back to my childhood. 
I once went out the back street one winter’s night in my stocking feet to let my beloved dog Tess back in after her ablutions and a good bark.  A great big greasy looking sewer rat type very kindly decided to walk over my feet.  I turned and fled and unofficially broke the world 100 metres record.  
Anyway I digress.  I spent many a happy and not so happy time fishing.  I enjoyed my time sitting fishing with a keep net full of Thwaites beer and half bottle of whisky to keep me warm.
 I can recall breaking ice with a stone and spending TWO hours shivering and feeling sorry for myself.  I never caught anything but what’s better than a bit of hypothermia now again?

I met a few nutcases on my fishing adventures.  I often  remember the one man and his dog that would stand behind you watching your float for about five minutes.  Then they would say:
 “Have you caught out (anything) mate?” 
I would reply yes or no and they would shrug their shoulders and walk off.  Thanks a lot dog walker for standing behind me and sending me paranoid.  Oh the times I used to think some mass murderer was going to kill me and make me into their dog: Rover’s dog food.   
 One time I joined a local fishing society.  I walked the two miles to my new fishing paradise and began to assemble my fishing rod.  A friendly neighbouring angler fishing on the opposite peg greeted me by saying:
 “Get to f8ck off there.  You’re not fishing on my peg”. 
I looked in front of my peg (a prostrate wooden pallet, precariously hanging over the water) and noticed the “friendly Fishermans” float.   I tried to protest that I was only fishing on a vacant peg and he threatened to give me good hiding. 
I was only 16 and he was about forty.   Friendly fisherman was built like the proverbial brick shithouse, and his cat had obviously urinated on their corn flakes that very morning.   So I picked up my tackle and left “friendly angler” to his half of the fishing lodge. 

Not all anglers are crazy though.  Some of them are well balanced, upstanding members of the community.  They have hobbies like Bingo!  

31 comments:

  1. It all sounds very fishy to me...

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  2. Replies
    1. I can always be relied on to come up with the obvious cliche 😉

      Delete
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      Delete
  3. Not at all Jaycee. I always appreciate comments.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Sounds like the brick outhouse fellow was a coarse fisherman in more ways than one! By the way, thanks for giving the OUP definition of "terrified" in brackets. I never knew that it meant "shit scared"! Clarification is always helpful.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Coarse fisherman was not a nice person to meet YP. Thanks for commenting.

    ReplyDelete
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  17. i already gave up on ever getting cured of HSV2 because i have try many treatment none of them work out for me i have go to different hospital they always tell me same thing there is no cure for herpes when i came across a post about Dr oyagu, in the net from a lady called Rebecca i contacted him and he reassured me with him herbal medicine which i took according to the way he instructed, that how i was cured. I doubted at first because i have been to a whole lot of reputable doctors, tried a lot of medicines but none was able to cure me. so i decided to listen to him and he commenced treatment, and under two weeks i was totally free from Herpes. i want to say a very big thank you to DR oyagu for what he has done in my life. feel free to leave him a message on email oyaguherbalhome@gmail.com and also WhatsApp him +2348101755322..
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    ReplyDelete

  18. Hello Am From The UK , I want to write a little testimony about the good work of doctor Oyagu who cured me from Hsv 1 and 2 for just 2 weeks with his herbal medicine, I never believe I can be normal again and have a good life like others I always regretted the day I got diagnose with the virus, I was lost of hope when my doctor told me there is no cure for it but I keep thinking and thinking about my future, if I can have kids of my own well I am so grateful for my helper who get me cured with his herbal medicine, I go online in search of anything that can help me because I can’t deal with it forever so I found this doc Oyagu email on a blog of someone who was cured by him I quickly contact him for help and explain all my pain to him, he told me not to worry about it there is cure for real, I never believe until he send me the herbal medicine when I order for it and I have it within 4 days that is how I took the medicine for 2 week and the following week I go for test just to confirm I was 100% cured from this sickness what a miracle in my life I am so happy right now, you can also get in contact with him if you have such sickness through email address oyaguherbalhome@gmail. com or text him on what's app, phone number +2348101755322 Dr Oyagu also has remedy to others disease like COLD SORES,HIV/AIDS,DIABETES.CANCER,HIGH BLOOD PRESSURE AND MANY MORE. I oblige everyone to contact this powerful herbalist Dr Oyagu and be free from suffering.

    ReplyDelete
  19. I AM SO VERY HAPPY TODAY!!! That is why I am giving this big thanks to Dr.Kham for curing me from HERPES. I have been suffering from HERPES for the past six (6)years and i tried everything possible to get myself cured but i couldn't get any solution! until i decided to try herbal cure. That was how i got in contact with this great herbal doctor in an online research, i contacted him and demand for the cure and he send me the cure through UPS and gave me instructions on how to use it and after one week of taking the herbal medicine of Dr Kham i went to the hospital for check and to God be the glory i tested HERPES negative, (I am so glad to see myself HERPES negative once again). I’m very proud to express my happiness through this platform and to say a big thanks to Dr. Kham for restoring my life back to normal. You can as well contact Dr. Kham via email: dr.khamcaregiver@gmail.com or dr.khamcaregiver@outlook.com or you can call and whatsapp him on +2348159922297, You can Also Visit his website to know more about him at > https://drkhamherbalhealingcenter.wordpress.com/ or https://drkhamcaregiver.wixsite.com/drkhamcaregiverherba if you are infected with HERPES virus or having any health problems you can contact Dr Kham and he will help you. DOCTOR KHAM CAN AS WELL CURE THE FOLLOWING DISEASE:1. HIV/AIDS2. HERPES
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    Dr Kham is capable of curing any type of diseases with his herbal medicine. Once again his email is dr.khamcaregiver@outlook.com or dr.khamcaregiver@gmail.com


    ReplyDelete
  20. Never give up in life they all say no cure to HSV 2 which is a big lie I have pass through many process also i never believe there is really cure to HERPES until I meet Dr.odoma the doctor that have been helping many people for many years, I come across this doctor online when I was searching for cure online I found out about this man, and to my greatest surprise this man have the herbal medicine which I have been looking for years I explain my problem to him through the email I found on someone who testify about him also, Dr.odoma write me a reply and explain how the process work so after ordering for the medicine I got it within 4 days and I took it according to the way Dr.odoma instructed, I was so happy after two week I took the medicine there was very big change in my health when I was done with the process I go for test, I found out I am negative that was the day I have the tears of joy you can also get in contact with my doctor through his email now drodomasolutionhome20@gmail.com or you can also WhatsApp him +2348100649947. And He also have herbs medicine to cured the following diseases; eczema,urethra wart,chronic problems.Herpes, Cancer, Als,Hepatitis, Diabetes, HPV,Infections,ulcer  ETC

    ReplyDelete
  21. I want to use this opportunity to thank Dr Oyagu for the grate work he has done for me and my cousin sister, I was cured from herpes virus through his herbal remedy and my cousin sisters was also cured from Cancer. This is a grate testimony for what Dr Oyagu Has done for me and my entire generation. I’m giving this testimony so that those of you out there can contact him while he keeps saving my relatives. Send him a Dm and get a better health totally. Contact him via WhatsApp +2348101755322 or Email address:oyaguherbalhome@gmail.com

    ReplyDelete
  22. I found out, that taking herbal treatment is the best to get rid of hpv as soon as i feel the symptoms of hpv is appearing, i took the healing process by contacting Dr onokun for natural treatment it works wonders, amazingly ever since I had the herbal treatment i have not feel these horrible disease anymore and my doc told me the virus is gone, i am glad i finally got cured out from this horrible disease. every hpv or herpes patients should also get in touch with this herbalist Dr to get ride of these disease forever his email address; dronokunherbalcure@gmail.com 

    ReplyDelete

  23. I'm 40 years old female I tested genital herpes (HSV1-2) positive in 2002. I was having bad outbreaks. EXTREMELY PAINFUL. I have try different kinds of drugs and treatment by the medical doctors all to know was avail. Six months ago I was desperately online searching for a helpful remedies for genital herpes (HSV1-2) cure, which i come across some helpful remedies on how Dr OYAGU have help so many people in curing genital herpes (HSV1-2) with the help of herbal treatment because I too believe there is someone somewhere in the world who can cure herpes completely. At of the past 2 months, however, I've been following his herpes protocol Via oyaguherbalhome@gmail.com or +2348101755322 and it stopped all outbreaks completely! To my greatest surprise I was cured completely by following the protocol of his herbal medicine . Don't be discouraged by the medical doctors. There is a cure for HSV with the help of herbs and roots by a herbalist Dr call Dr OYAGU he is so kind and truthful with his herbal treatment, kindly contact him for more information Via oyaguherbalhome@gmail.com or WhatsApp DR on +2348101755322 you will be lucky as i am today

    ReplyDelete
  24. I want to use this opportunity to thank Dr Oyagu for the grate work he has done for me and my cousin sister, I was cured from herpes virus through his herbal remedy and my cousin sisters was also cured from Cancer. This is a grate testimony for what Dr Oyagu Has done for me and my entire generation. I’m giving this testimony so that those of you out there can contact him while he keeps saving my relatives. Send him a Dm and get a better health totally. Contact him via WhatsApp +2348101755322 or Email address:oyaguherbalhome@gmail.com you can also reach him on his website https://oyaguspellcaster.wixsite.com/oyaguherbalhome

    ReplyDelete
  25. I was cured of HIV with the use of natural herbs. My name is Alandre and I'm from Texas. I love herbs so much. Most times, injection and drugs are just a waste of time. I was cured, I suffered from HIV for 13 years but with the help of Dr. Mark herbal medicine, I was cured within a few weeks of drinking the herbs he sent to me through courier delivery service. This same doctor also cured my Aunty from herpes, as soon as I heard she had herpes, I quickly refer her to Dr.Mark and she was cured too after drinking his herbs.I have referred a lot of people to Dr. Mark and they were all cured from their various illness. Have you taken herbs before?. You have spent so much money on drugs,injections,surgeries etc and yet you have no good result to show for it. Contact Dr. Mark now, he is a herbalist doctor, Dr. Mark has herbs that cures Hiv, Herpes, diabetics, asthma, hepatitis, STD, cancer, chronic, etc. Contact Dr Mark through his Email address on: blessedlovetemple@gmail.com Please share the good news to other people once you are cured.

    ReplyDelete
  26. I already gave up on ever getting cured of HSV2 because i have try many treatment none of them work out for me i have be to different hospital they always tell me same thing there is no cure for herpes when i came across a post about Dr oyagu, in the net from a lady called Rebecca i contacted him and he reassured me with his herbal medicine which i took according to the way he instructed, that how i was cured. I doubted at first because i have been to a whole lot of reputable doctors, tried a lot of medicines but none was able to cure me. so i decided to listen to him and he commenced treatment, and under two weeks i was totally free from Herpes. i want to say a very big thank you to DR oyagu for what he has done in my life. feel free to leave him a message on email oyaguherbalhome@gmail.com and also WhatsApp him +2348101755322.. or vist his website https://oyaguspellcaster.wixsite.com/oyaguherbalhome. He can still be able to help you with this herbs medicine: 1...ALS CURE/DIABETES CURE/EPILESY/HPV CURE/LUPUS/HEPATITIS/CANCER/GOUT

    ReplyDelete
  27. I was cured of HIV with the use of natural herbs. My name is Alandre and I'm from Texas. I love herbs so much. Most times, injection and drugs are just a waste of time. I was cured, I suffered from HIV for 13 years but with the help of Dr. Mark herbal medicine, I was cured within a few weeks of drinking the herbs he sent to me through courier delivery service. This same doctor also cured my Aunty from herpes, as soon as I heard she had herpes, I quickly refer her to Dr.Mark and she was cured too after drinking his herbs.I have referred a lot of people to Dr. Mark and they were all cured from their various illness. Have you taken herbs before?. You have spent so much money on drugs,injections,surgeries etc and yet you have no good result to show for it. Contact Dr. Mark now, he is a herbalist doctor, Dr. Mark has herbs that cures Hiv, Herpes, diabetics, asthma, hepatitis, STD, cancer, chronic, etc. Contact Dr Mark through his Email address on: blessedlovetemple@gmail.com Please share the good news to other people once you are cured

    ReplyDelete
  28. I'm 40 years old female I tested genital herpes (HSV1-2) positive in 2016. I was having bad outbreaks. EXTREMELY PAINFUL. I have try different kinds of drugs and treatment by the medical doctors all to know was avail. Six months ago I was desperately online searching for a helpful remedies for genital herpes (HSV1-2) cure, which I come across some helpful remedies on how Dr OYAGU have help so many people in curing genital herpes (HSV1-2) with the help of herbal treatment because I too believe there is someone somewhere in the world who can cure herpes completely. At of the past 2 months, however, I've been following his herpes protocol Via oyaguherbalhome@gmail.com or +2348101755322 and it stopped all outbreaks completely! To my greatest surprise I was cured completely by following the protocol of his herbal medicine . Don't be discouraged by the medical doctors. There is a cure for HSV with the help of herbs and roots by a herbalist Dr call Dr OYAGU he is so kind and truthful with his herbal treatment, kindly contact him for more information Via oyaguherbalhome@gmail.com or WhatsApp DR on +2348101755322 or visit his website https://oyaguspellcaster.wixsite.com/oyaguherbalhome you will be lucky as I am today

    ReplyDelete
  29. Website: (https://emutemple.wordpress.com/)  I was born and raised in a small town on Long Island in New York. I live there today with my wife and three wonderful children. I want to testify of how I was cured from prostate cancer by Dr Emu. I was on hormone therapy for advanced prostate cancer. At first I was having lots of signs and symptoms like excessive urine at midnight and also I was experiencing dribbling of urine all the time I was going through hell I search for a cure☑ on the internet I came to know about Dr Emu I saw lots of testimonies of how he cures diseases like *Prostate Cancer *Herpes  Virus *Genital herpes *Hiv/Aids*Breast Cancer and more am happy am cured thanks to Dr Emu I recommend Dr Emu roots and herbs as best natural herbal medicine with no side effects. For consultation and more contact him via Email: (emutemple@gmail.com) (emutemple@yahoo.com) WhatsApp or call +2347012841542 

    ReplyDelete

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 I am starting one of my roughing it holidays this weekend.   This consists of hiking over here and going to two music festivals and visitin...