Have you ever been to a car boot sale? Nobody ever sells one do they? A car boot I mean. I used to spend every summer Sunday morning
getting up at six to travel to some MONSTER car boot sale in Cheshire or North
Wales. I think the devil must have
invented the car boot sale. They must be
the biggest reason for the decline of church attendances in recent years. Not to forget people like a certain Church of
England bishop doubting that God actually existed. Which is something similar to the manager of
Tesco announcing through his tannoy to a packed supermarket of shoppers:
“Don’t buy anything from us. Go up the road to Sainsbury’s their stuff is
far tastier and cheaper!”
Car boot sales are great places to get a bargain. It’s also a good place to buy something that
doesn’t work. I have bought a couple of
vacuum cleaners from a spiv with a decorating table in the middle of some farmer’s
field. They looked the part and a great state of the art house cleaning apparatus. Until you get home that is. You plug your new Hoover into the socket and
end up with more sparks than a rocket launcher.
Or better still, it is like the parrot in the
Monty Python Dead Parrot sketch, it is well and truly (answers on a postcard)
f.....d. Still not to worry. You only paid twenty quid each for them
!
Never walk round a car boot sale with small children in
tow. Pharisee car booters will have got
up at the crack of dawn and placed toys on the ground just at the right height
for little Billy or Jill. So there you
are looking at some interesting books and your child suddenly does it’s
Mussolini impersonation:
“I want dat."
Or in other words:
" I
demand this toy”.
You then tell it not to be silly and you don’t need
another action man tank. Small child
suddenly takes on its theatrical mode, that it usually plays in the supermarket
at the pay point where they keep the TOFFEES! Or under the clothes in Marks and Sparks throwing it self around like a Dervish or somebody being attacked in Jaws.
Your child goes absolutely well and truly ape
shit! You look in a wing mirror of a car
boot seller’s car and see that you have just gone totally grey. There is only one thing to do in the
situation. You hand over your beer
tokens and attempt to walk through the multitudes carrying a Barbie doll, Wendy
house, space hopper and a chopper bike.
Forget the gardening books.
Somebody bought them when small child went ballistic!
Those were the days! Have you got any car boot sales stories?
I have never seen/been to a car book sale. Sounds as if I have missed a lot in life! Enjoyed this read immensely, especially the tale about the child who did a Mussolini impersonation.
ReplyDeleteThanks Valerie. Yes car boot sales can be great fun. You meet some characters and find some great bargains. There's nothing worse than a toddler that's got tired legs and decides it deserves a big toy reward for all the tramping around. We use to go to giant carboot sales like Chelford in Cheshire and an old airfield at Chirk in North Wales. On a nice summers day they can be like a carboot town and take hours to get round. I have many happy collecting memories with my family. Wish my dad was here now and we could go car booting. Thanks for your comment Valerie.
ReplyDeleteI have never been to a car boot sale. They were always regarded as outlets for stolen property and a hidden economy.
ReplyDeleteThey are a great way to pass a few hours. You meet some wonderful characters and can pick up lots of bargains sometimes antiques. They are ideal for somebody who wants to equip an home very cheaply. Thanks.
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