Monday, 9 November 2020

The "Novice" Allotment Holder.

The "Novice" Allotment Holder.  

This is true dear readers:

Another creature I met on my allotment saunters is the"novice" allotment holder.  Lets call him Mick the new lad.  He informed me that he was sick and tired of playing darts and he wanted:

"Summat to do."

"At the weekends."

The poor man was bored and was in need of an hobby or leisure pursuit.  Especially when it wasn't the football season.    

Oh to watch a live football match, eat a potato pie and drink a cup of Bovril.  Maybe even a pint of bitter?  Something else to miss from Blighty.  Rock concerts too.  It's enough to make you put your name down for an allotment.  I have my own but it's  not the same without the characters is it?

Any road:

I informed him that I was an allotment grower.  I suggested that he got himself an allotment to show his family what an hunter, gatherer, he was or wasn't?  He was quite enthusiastic to the idea and I managed to secure him the tenancy of an half plot. 

He was duly delighted with his new plot.  Until he realised  that the four foot high plot of grass and Rose-bay willow herb was his new Potager.  He was quite taken back and expected his'new' plot to be dug over, ready for him!

"Yeah right!"

"Pull the other one.  There are bells on it!"

He soon got over his disappointment and duly rushed down to Wilkinsons in the High Street and purchased a new spade (toy) and an array of vegetable and flower seeds which he purchased in OCTOBER!  

A month or two later.  I went to see how he had been getting on with his new vegetable endeavours.  In fact he had managed to clear SIX feet square of soil.  It was just after Christmas.  I asked him how he was enjoying his new hobby?

"I don't know Dave."

He says.

"I can't understand why none of my vegetable seeds have come up"/germinated.

The silly billy had only sowed and planted his Summer vegetables in WINTER !


44 comments:

  1. Hmmm.. perhaps like some people of the male variety he never reads the instruction manual but just gets stuck in. Not like you, of course xx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
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  2. God loves a trier JayCee. At least he didn't just erect a shed and move in and escape from the missus and white goods? Novice Allotment had a go. I am chief digger and weeder and the wife sows and cooks the lovely veg.🥪

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
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  3. Poor lad! He was probably a full blood Lancastrian whereas your genes were enriched by your Irish ancestors.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Ha,ha. He was from Cheshire actually YP. My mother's grandmother came from Wrexham. So I have English, Irish and Welsh genes.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I used to like American genes - Levi and Wrangler but I haven't worn any for years!

      Delete
  5. Ha,ha. I always laugh when I hear Americans say "I'm Irish American." I have even got a great great grandfather from somewhere in Yorkshire. Levi Strause was a clever man during the Gold Rush. Instead of searching for gold he sold denim and work tools. Clever chap,

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You have a smidgeon of Yorkshire blood in you? Oh - that is so nice to hear! In contrast with you I am 100% Yorkshire - no Irish, Scottish, Welsh, Derbyshire, Russian, French or Italian blood at all. But if you reach further back in time I am of Viking descent. No wonder I am so bloodthirsty!

      Delete
    2. More than a smidgeon YP. Do I detect some Wiltshire blood with you using the word smidgeon?😀 I think we all have Viking, Roman, Norman....genes.

      Delete
    3. They didn't have denim in those days.

      Delete
  6. Levi Strauss and co. Silly autocorrect.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Another interesting character. At least he gave it a go.

    ReplyDelete
  8. You're right Linda. Perhaps if he had some help tackling his overgrown jungle of an allotment he might of reaped the benefits of his labour?😊

    ReplyDelete
  9. My children's father is Irish and very proud of the fact. When my son and daughter in law (who is Boston Irish, and her family is equally as proud of their heritage) went to Ireland 3 years ago, they were advised to NEVER, NEVER talk about their Irish heritage that it upset the Irish. So they went and they truly enjoyed their time in Ireland driving from the east to the west, and stopping wherever they pleased. People were friendly and they loved the pubs and the music, and they never felt like strangers, always welcomed. At one of the pubs, though, a very drunk old man, said, "So where are you from? And Dylan said, "Pennsylvania." And the man said, "What is your nationality?" And Dylan said, "I'm an American." "No, where does your family come from?" And Dylan said, "Pennsylvania." He knew what the man was after. And the man kept pestering and said, "What is your heritage?" and Dylan said, "Okay, I'm Irish, is that what you want to hear?" And the man roared, "Heeeeeeeeeere we go...."

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I think Ireland missed the American tourists this year Debby. I have quite a broad Lancastrian accent. Some one asked me the other day if I come from Yorkshire. Another one is when some one asks me how long am I on holiday? "Nearly twenty years" is my reply.

      Delete
  10. I had a dragon of a great-aunt growing up. An ex teacher, widowed in WWI, she liked kids, and she used to tell me that everyone is allowed to make any mistake once. Making that same mistake again was not on. What happened to the novice. Did he turn out to be a fine gardener?

    ReplyDelete
  11. Your 'dragon' of a great aunt sounds very sensible.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Your great aunt sounds very wise. Novice Allotment holder gave up his plot and went back to playing darts.

    ReplyDelete
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    HOW DR AZIBA HELPED ME ENLARGE MY PENIS SIZE FROM 3.5 INCHES TO 11INCHES LONG AND 8.0 GROWTH WhatsAPP DR [ +2348100368288 ]
    I got married 2 years ago and it just seemed that there was no excitement in my sex life. My dysfunction to perform to the best of my abilities in bed made it harder for my wife and me to have a good time during sex. And i was having the feelings that she may decide to get a divorce one day. I knew something had to be done in order to improve my sex life and to save my marriage because my marriage was already falling apart, so when i was on my Facebook page i came across a story of how Dr Aziba helped him enlarged his penis to 8ins better.so i Immediately copied the Email address of the Dr and explained to him my problem,he gave me some simply instruction which i must follow and i did easily and my friends Today, i am the happiest man on Earth, All Thanks to Dr Aziba for saving my marriage and making me a real man today.i asked him about some purpular diseases like HERPES,HIV AIDS,HEPATITES,DIABETIS, CANCERS, WART, Get Ex back ,etc....... which are affecting most people he said there is no disease without a cure , he has it all...You can as well reach the Dr below for help on your problem, for he has the solution to all...
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    ReplyDelete

  22.  ***PLEASE READ*** 
    I can never thank you enough DR.BALBOSA for the wonderful work you did for me and my kids to bring back my husband. Am stella Andre from England. I was having serious relationship problems with my husband and he was no longer committed to me and our kids, when i asked him what the problem was he told me he has fell out of love for me and wanted a divorce and  i was so heart broken, i cried all day and night, it had resulted in him moving out to his friend’s apartment. Everything got worse because he started going to bars and strip clubs frequently with his friend, getting drunk and passing out. He always threatens me on the phone whenever I call him because of all the bad advice that his friend has given him. I really love him and we had been married for 8 years which gave us a beautiful daughter and a son. I had also lost a lot of money on therapists until I was introduced to DR. BALBOSA by a friend whom he helped to marry her childhood boyfriend, this gave me total confidence and strength to get him back. I did all that DR. BALBOSA asked me to do it and I also followed all instructions given to me by DR. BALBOSA to my greatest surprise after 48 hours my husband called me and rushed back home with a brown new car for me and our kids... things just changed between us emotionally, I was the happiest woman on earth that day. my husband now has a good job and stopped drinking and he stopped keeping irrelevant friends. It’s a miracle I never believed was possible because I had lost all hope until I found DR. BALBOSA...contact him today and get your love back i can assure you .... contact him on his Email on: balbosasolutionhome@gmail.com and CALL/ WHATSAPP: +2347048047728... Good luck... 

    ReplyDelete
  23. How i was able to have my ex back with me again


    Hello everyone i want to testify of the great and powerful spell caster named Dr IYAYA who brought back my ex who left me and got engaged to another girl,We where happy together when all of a sudden he just change he used to call me every morning and and night before going to bed but all that stopped when i call him he yell at me and told me he didn't want to have anything to do with me anymore i was so sad and confused i didn't know what to do then i went online to search on how to get back my ex then i found an article where someone was talking about how the great and powerful Dr IYAYA helped her and she left his email address i took it and contacted him i told him my problem he only smiled and told me to relax everything will be OK i did everything he asked me to do and he assured me that after 24hrs he will be back,To my greatest surprise the next morning it was my boyfriend he came back knelling and begging for me to accept him back now we are so happy together he can also help you contact him Here: Doctoriyaya@gmail.com you can also reach Dr IYAYA throungh WhatsApp Number: +2347032756397
    If you wish to know more about Dr IYAYA visit he website you may found your solution there www.https://dr-iyaya-herbal-remedy.webnode.com

    ReplyDelete
  24. This is very simple method about penis Enlargement Herbal medicine is 100% guaranteed for Penis Enlargement and Good Erection, The main reason why lots of men are finding it difficult to Enlarge penis and last long during xxx is because they so believe in medical report and drugs made of chemicals which cause damages to the body system. so I'm recommending Y'all fellow men facing this mess to contact Dr Aziba WhatsApp via +2348100368288 or Email : priestazibasolutioncenter@gmail.com for Natural Herbal Penis Enlargement Product






    This is very simple method about penis Enlargement Herbal medicine is 100% guaranteed for Penis Enlargement and Good Erection, The main reason why lots of men are finding it difficult to Enlarge penis and last long during xxx is because they so believe in medical report and drugs made of chemicals which cause damages to the body system. so I'm recommending Y'all fellow men facing this mess to contact Dr Aziba WhatsApp via +2348100368288 or Email : priestazibasolutioncenter@gmail.com for Natural Herbal Penis Enlargement Product

    ReplyDelete
  25. My ex-husband and I had always managed to stay friendly after our divorce in February 2017. But I always wanted to get back together with him, All it took was a visit to this spell casters website last December, because my dream was to start a new year with my husband, and live happily with him.. This spell caster requested a specific love spell for me and my husband, and I accepted it. And this powerful spell caster began to work his magic. And 48 hours after this spell caster worked for me, my husband called me back for us to be together again, and he was remorseful for all his wrong deeds. My spell is working because guess what: My “husband” is back and we are making preparations on how to go to court and withdraw our divorce papers ASAP. This is nothing short of a miracle. Thank you Dr Emu for your powerful spells. Words are not enough. here is his Email: emutemple@gmail.com or call/text him on his WhatsApp +2347012841542

    He is also able to cast spell like 1: Lottery 2: Conceive 3: Breakup 4: Divorce 5: Cure for all kinds of diseases and viruses.

    ReplyDelete
  26. Greatest thanks to Dr Oyagu for his herbal drugs that he prepared for me and when I start using it in just 2weeks I was completely cured and that ended my HERPES SIMPLEX 1&2 DISEASE i am so happy and grateful to Dr Oyagu . after reading about him on a testimony of Jason Cash on a blogger. I knew suddenly Dr Oyagu was the right Doctor to cure my HERPES SIMPLEX 1&2 DISEASE. I discuss with Dr Oyagu and he prepared a herbal medicine for me and when it got sent to me in south Korean . I used the herbal medicine and 2weeks and i went to check up again. after 15years of suffering from HERPES SIMPLEX 1&2 at last i am smiling once again. Dr Oyagu also has remedy to others disease like COLD SORES,HIV/AIDS,DIABETES.CANCER,HIGH BLOOD PRESSURE AND MANY MORE. I oblige everyone to contact this powerful herbalist Dr Oyagu and be free from your suffering. contact his WhatsApp line: +2348101755322 or visit his Website https://oyaguspellcaster.wixsite.com/oyaguherbalhome Email:Oyaguherbalhome@gmail.com

    ReplyDelete
  27. Greatest thanks to Dr Oyagu for his herbal drugs that he prepared for me and when I start using it in just 2weeks I was completely cured and that ended my HERPES SIMPLEX 1&2 DISEASE i am so happy and grateful to Dr Oyagu . after reading about him on a testimony of Jason Cash on a blogger. I knew suddenly Dr Oyagu was the right Doctor to cure my HERPES SIMPLEX 1&2 DISEASE. I discuss with Dr Oyagu and he prepared a herbal medicine for me and when it got sent to me in south Korean . I used the herbal medicine and 2weeks and i went to check up again. after 15years of suffering from HERPES SIMPLEX 1&2 at last i am smiling once again. Dr Oyagu also has remedy to others disease like COLD SORES,HIV/AIDS,DIABETES.CANCER,HIGH BLOOD PRESSURE AND MANY MORE. I oblige everyone to contact this powerful herbalist Dr Oyagu and be free from your suffering. contact his WhatsApp line: +2348101755322 or visit his Website https://oyaguspellcaster.wixsite.com/oyaguherbalhome Email:Oyaguherbalhome@gmail.com

    ReplyDelete
  28. I’ve been Feeling weak and always feeling sleepy for some time which I went for a test and I was told i am diagnosed with Amyotrophic lateral sclerosis Disease (ALS DISEASE) ever since then I've followed a wide variety of medical treatments, I have even combined with different pills and antibiotics without clear results. My health was deteriorating more and more. But thanks to a Herbal Doctor's herbs method that I found on the internet which has saved so many lives and also helped me to achieve the results i wanted, i knew from the beginning that this could help me after much learning and the cure Dr sent to me and which I began to follow the method from the Herbal Doctor called (Dr Aziba) and the results were wonderful: I recommend you to get in contact with him via Email: priestazibasolutioncenter@gmail.com and on WhatsApp: +2348100368288 for ALS, HPV, HSV, HERPES, Virginal Infection Cure etc.. DR is also available to help!






    I’ve been Feeling weak and always feeling sleepy for some time which I went for a test and I was told i am diagnosed with Amyotrophic lateral sclerosis Disease (ALS DISEASE) ever since then I've followed a wide variety of medical treatments, I have even combined with different pills and antibiotics without clear results. My health was deteriorating more and more. But thanks to a Herbal Doctor's herbs method that I found on the internet which has saved so many lives and also helped me to achieve the results i wanted, i knew from the beginning that this could help me after much learning and the cure Dr sent to me and which I began to follow the method from the Herbal Doctor called (Dr Aziba) and the results were wonderful: I recommend you to get in contact with him via Email: priestazibasolutioncenter@gmail.com and on WhatsApp: +2348100368288 for ALS, HPV, HSV, HERPES, Virginal Infection Cure etc.. DR is also available to help!





    I’ve been Feeling weak and always feeling sleepy for some time which I went for a test and I was told i am diagnosed with Amyotrophic lateral sclerosis Disease (ALS DISEASE) ever since then I've followed a wide variety of medical treatments, I have even combined with different pills and antibiotics without clear results. My health was deteriorating more and more. But thanks to a Herbal Doctor's herbs method that I found on the internet which has saved so many lives and also helped me to achieve the results i wanted, i knew from the beginning that this could help me after much learning and the cure Dr sent to me and which I began to follow the method from the Herbal Doctor called (Dr Aziba) and the results were wonderful: I recommend you to get in contact with him via Email: priestazibasolutioncenter@gmail.com and on WhatsApp: +2348100368288 for ALS, HPV, HSV, HERPES, Virginal Infection Cure etc.. DR is also available to help!

    ReplyDelete
  29. Hello everyone, sharing this testimony is my greatest happiness also to let every patient know there is cure to get rid of human papillomavirus. I was once a HPV patient for a very long time. I have been taking medications because my doc in Canada told me there is no cure except pills to control it which I have been taking. Until I found a faithful and truthful herbalist who finally cured me with herbal remedy. Everything about the virus was gone, my genital warts I have been trying to remove, they all cleared off. Here is the herbalist information to reach him via : oyaguherbalhome@gmail.com or whatsapp +2348101755322 his website https://oyaguspellcaster.wixsite.com/oyaguherbalhome. Dr Oyagu is great and very kind to every patient. He also Cure
    1) HIV/AIDs Virus
    2) Hepatitis B and C
    3) Herpes
    4) Cancer
    5) ZIKA VIRUS
    6) COPD
    7) STROKE.
    8) Erectile Dysfunction
    9) Trichomoniasis
    10) Chlamydia
    11) Gonorrhea
    12) HPV
    13) Syphilis

    ReplyDelete
  30. Omg I Finally Got Helped  !! I'm so excited right now, I just have to share my testimony on this Forum.. The feeling of being loved takes away so much burden from our shoulders. I had all this but I made a big mistake when I cheated on my wife with another woman  and my wife left me for over 4 months after she found out..  I was lonely, sad and devastated. Luckily I was directed to a very powerful spell caster Dr Emu who helped me cast a spell of reconciliation on our Relationship and he brought back my wife and now she loves me far more than ever.. I'm so happy with life now. Thank you so much Dr Emu, kindly Contact  Dr Emu Today and get any kind of help you want.. Via Email emutemple@gmail.com or Call/WhatsApp +2347012841542

    ReplyDelete
  31. Getting your lover or your ex back has been made more easy by this powerful spell caster called Dr Odion. I am Rose by name and i am from canada, the only reason why i am on this site is to thank this powerful spell caster called DR. Odion and you can improve your relationship success by contacting him through these details (wisdomspiritualtemple@gmail.com Or call +2348136482342) This powerful spell caster did me a huge favor by helping me get my lover back to me within the speed of light and since then my relationship has been perfect.

    any problem of yours. He is specialized in the following:

    (1)Spell for protection from danger
    (2)Spell for magic
    (3)Spell for same sex love
    (4)Spell for healing
    (5)Spell for invisibility
    (6)Spell for riches and fame
    (7)Spell to get a good job
    (8)Spell for strong love and relationship
    (9)Spell to bring your ex back
    (10)speII for Lottery
    This man has great powers and is incredibly generous. You can contact him on
    (wisdomspiritualtemple@gmail.com)

    ReplyDelete
  32. It's a pleasure for me to write this testimony about this wonderful thing that happened to me last week on how i got my peripheral artery disease (PAD) cured, i have been reading so-many post of some people who were cured of peripheral artery disease (PAD), but i never believed them, I was hurt and depressed so I was too curious and wanted to try dr emu when i contact him, he assured me 100% that he will heal me, i pleaded with him to help me out, it's a great success that he healed just as he promised, he told me that in three days time that i should go and check on my peripheral artery disease (PAD) status, I was floored that when i went to the hospital to check of my status that i was peripheral artery disease (PAD) negative, i never thought possible that dr emu can do miracles, i never really believed in magic but I played along with a little hope and faith and after everything but dr emu changed my life and made me a true believer you can contact him emutemple@gmail.com  emutemple@yahoo.com or whatsapp Number: +2347012841542 website: https://emutemple.wordpress.com/ he said that he is also specialize on the following diseases: HERPES, HIV, ALS, HPV, DIABETES, HEPATITIS B, CANCER, SICKLE CELL, VIRGINAL DRYNESS, And Bring Back Your Ex back.

    ReplyDelete

I Found A Miners Lamp From Wigan At A Carbootsale In West Cork.

  We got up this morning and  went to a carboot sale here in West Cork.  It's great to see things getting back to normal after the Covid...