Monday, 9 April 2018

And Yet Another One Of My Allotment Characters: "Mr Talk" A Good Plot!

This kind fellow with his fountain of advice is usually an active member of most allotment societies.  His main purpose/vocation in life is to "TALK" a good veg allotment plot.  

He does not give a dot who you are and will think nothing of leaning on your allotment hedge/ fence (what ever you have) and smile and inform you that you're not growing vegetables and fruit correctly.  He is very much like that Harry Enfield character who is always saying: 

"You don't want to do it like that!"

"East to West is always best".

Mr "Talk a good plot" willl tell you how to sow, dig, rotovate, water, how to 'cook' your pot noodle, how to tidy your shed, even how to choose the right sized bricks and pieces of stone and concrete to hold the corrugated sheets down on you allotment shed!

One day the penny drops in your head and you decide to go have a look at Mr "Talk a good plots" potager/allotment.  You peer over the bramble covered rickity falling down pallet fence and see an overgrown vegetable plot with a few slug laced cabbages!  

Mr "Talk a good plot" if asked, would say he's created a natural habitat and allotment paradise for mankind and for all things bright and beautiful!  


Have you met this 
character?









13 comments:

  1. He must be a wishful thinker, one of those who can't stand others doing better than himself - even if he tried. It makes for an amusing blog post, though. Have a nice day.

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  2. Thanks Valerie. Yes he "talks" a good allotment. He uses his allotment membership to put the world to rights and tell people how to garden his way. He's one of life's characters that makes you laugh or pull your hair out. Thanks!

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  3. Ha ha, those people are found everywhere.

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  4. Yes they are everywhere Terra. Thanks!

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  5. I'm still trying to figure out what Mr Clockwork does with himself when it's persistently pouring. I expecting his ham sandwiches get soggy and rainwater from drips from his hat and waits staring at the water running down compost heap and looking at his pocket watch and shaking it from time to time until it's time to go home.

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  6. You're right Gwil. Mr Clockwork takes a leaf from Mr Shed man and Mr Weather Observer. There are lots of other allotment characters to give him their omnipotent allotment advice. Hopevyor are well?


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  7. I have not met this character in regards to allotments, but I have met loads of the same type in general life, who just have to correct you whatever you are saying or doing!

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  8. Mr general life would be another good name for him Vera. His no till and no cultivation gives a new kind of name to recreational gardening. Thanks!

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  9. These people are everywhere. They are a bit boring are they not!

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  10. They are everywhere Rachel. Perhaps they are frustrated would be politicians? Thanks!

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  11. LOL, we had one next to us, his plot was neat in squares with tidy paths.. ours was on the wild side but we successfully grew most everything and mowed down the weeds between the beds, all surrounded with chicken wire as there were monkjac deer that ate everything and we loved that plot and so did our dog as she chased up and down after the ball. It was less than a mile from Coventry city centre, but we sat and ate our sandwiches and drank our coffee with bird song and in sunshine..We gave up when we were called to our plot one Saturday morning to see our shed and all our tools burned and blackened, raised to the ground.. Bastards who ever did it, so we harvested that years veg and handed back our keys! Now we have a huge garden and only grow potatoes in bags and salad crops in pots!

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  12. Thanks Chris. I miss my allotments. You meet lots of characters from all walks of life. Some drive you mad and some seem mad them selves. Some people work hard and tend their allotments and some just "talk" a good vegetable allotment.

    We once visited Ryton Organic Gardens near Coventry. I haven't even planted my potatoes here yet. The trenches are dug and the potatoes are all chitted. Hope you have a good crop this year. Thanks!

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